Dramaqueen over a chair

August 24 5 comments | tags: pissed · FAVICON Contest

I was ready to break my fast, sitting next to my Mom and getting bread ready for my delicious lentil soup this Tuesday evening, when my brother comes waltzing down the stairs 5 minutes late for iftar.

He comes up to me in his sloppy demeanor and says,
“GET OUT OF MY SEAT“

Oh boy, do I love the seat game. I used to play this one when I was in preschool. You know when someone stole my spot on the 30 foot long carpet. Don’t even ask me how I know it was my spot, I just kinda had an instinct like that when I was 3 years old.

Anyway, Ali comes at me all like OMGGG GET OUTTA MAH SEAT standing like he just shot someone in an ally. I’m over there eating my fattoush peacefully, trying to ignore this animalistic human body when my mother chimes in,
“Hey, move. You know that’s his seat.“

Then we began. It was a battle of the seats. Ali disregarded the fact that there were two open spots open about 3 steps away from where he was standing. He wanted ‘his seat’. I guess I wasn’t alive when these things were assigned. I don’t remember having assigned seats on our family dinner table. How silly of me to think that Ali would sit on the end of the table, instead of the first spot. You can’t expect someone of Ali’s caliber to walk that many centimeters to sit in another chair, it’s ludicrous. With his 1.5 GPA in high school, inability to crack open a book that doesn’t have cartoons in it and his entrance into community college to pursue a career that he knows nothing about (that is out of his damn league…he might as well study to be a superhero he has a better chance at it)….he should be sitting on the roof in a golden, diamond encrusted chamber.

LISTEN UP BUDDY. IN THIS WORLD It’s first come, first served. It’s stupid to say someone has a seat or someone has a SPOT. It doesn’t matter where you sit to eat. Just be happy you have a meal and quit being a rotten brat about everything. Where I’m sitting is no different than where you are sitting 2 inches away. The only reason I didn’t move is because I sat there first. Ali expects us to bend to his every command, and on top of that he took his time coming down thinking that no one would dare sit there. The ‘assigned seats’ for the boys are the first two seats of the table, but the girls kinda just sit anywhere. Funny thing, the girls don’t have ‘assigned seats’. Just the guys? Love it.

I cannot tell you how frustrating it is when people are defending something so ridiculous.
Obviously my Mom would rather keep her cool with Ali than me. She then continued and told him to get another chair from the room so he can sit next to her. He said,
“NO. I WANNA SIT THERE. YOU KNEW I WAS GONNA SAY SOMETHING SO JUST MOVE.”

How silly of me to forget that this my brothers seat. I must leave it open at all times, even when Ali is not there to sit in it. God forbid someone change his chair too. That would be bad.

After 5 minutes of arguing back and forth and trying to convince my Mom she is arguing the most ridiculous case, I just took my plate and went downstairs. I would rather not eat at all than eat with these kind of people. You might think I would be so mad and enraged, but nah, it’s cool. I like when these things happen because they show someones’ true colors. Their real intentions.

To make things even better, Lisa comes downstairs where I was watching TV after just witnessing what just happened and asked me,
“WHY DIDNT YOU HELP?“

I was like O HELL NAW~ this girl is not asking me why I didn’t help them CLEAN the table after they just kicked me off. She was like OMG YOU DIDNT HAVE TO BE SUCH A DRAMAQUEEN U COUDA JUST SAT IN THE OTHER SPOT U NEVER HELP US CLEAN UR USING THIS AS AN EXCUSE~

LOL yeah Lisa. You are so freakin’ smart. I intentionally sat in Ali’s spot so I could go downstairs in a fit of annoyance after not eating or drinking ALL DAY so that I could get out of doing dishes and washing a table. Lisa then throws in the ‘dramaqueen’ bit because she knows all too much about being a dramaqueen. This is coming from the 15 year old who throws ‘cliche’ and ‘influence’ around like it compensates for her lack of intelligence about pretty much everything.

And there you have it folks. Another perfect dinner at my resort. But then again, this is why I’m going to subway in a few hours. Ha ha haha.

I got screwed over again

August 23 6 comments | tags: offline life · FAVICON Contest

My mom got off the phone with our family friend who helped me get the job at the grocery store. She told him about Sonya (my ‘ex-manager’) telling me they don’t need me to work anymore….to which he responded:
“ I just dropped off some food off at the store today. There is work, I don’t know why she did that. I’m going to talk to her about it.”

LOL this is interesting!!!!!!!

On TOP of that, they haven’t paid me yet. I stopped working Thursday, so you do the counting. Sonya said she would call me when I can come pick up the money I earned but she hasn’t called since Friday and uh I WANNA GO TO FOREVER21 AND BUY SOME FREAKIN JEANS so I gave her a call today. Just kidding though, I’m gonna save that money…and spend it on a llama farm. Then have those llamas run through that damn grocery store and then eat all the produce AND THEN WE’LL SEE WHO REALLY DOESN’T HAVE ANY WORK!!!

Sonya picked up and was hesitant saying, “OH I know I told you I would call you about picking up the money but I’ve been busy. Well (she blurbs out some name that I didn’t catch because she can’t speak at a normal rate) he’s not here…I’ll call you back later when he comes.”

I don’t even know who the hell HE is. She said it so damn fast I was like uh whaaaaa?? HE could be Matt Damon, Michael Jackson…GOD. A LLAMA. wtf. I AM TIRED OF GETTING SCREWED OVER. WHO IS HE AND WHEN IS HE GONNA REALIZE THAT I NEED MY MONEY???

First they basically give me the hand because I’m not fresh out from Lebanon and I’m sorry I’m americanized after being born and raised in America. No one can convince me that me being a female has no effect on this outcome because Sonya pretty much told me they’re keeping the male workers and cutting the girls off.

I feel like they treat me differently because I’m not 10000% fluent in arabic and I don’t get their stupid arabic jokes – not because I don’t understand what they’re saying but because they talk like a damn road runner. We’ll see what happens, but for now I’ll just take it that I’ve been lied to deceived. You know like when someone told Kim Kardashian it was totally normal to be hanging out with 14 year old boys and taking pictures with them. No worries though, I always get the last laugh :)

I Lost My Job

August 21 10 comments | tags: offline life · FAVICON Contest

The entire night my eyes were bothering me…it was like they were on fire the whole night :( Damnit there always has to be something wrong with me! I have more problems than a freakin math book.

I woke up this morning with my eyes half swollen, most of the swelling went away but the irritation is still there. I feel like crap.

My neighbors are still creepy and according to what happened a minute ago, I just lost my job at the grocery store. The ‘manager’ AKA the woman who talks on the phone all day and stares at celery just called and told me that they won’t be needing me to come in anymore. Apparently they are content with having 2 guys working an entire grocery store. Every day, every night. Two workers. Of course I assume that they will have used this excuse to get me the hell out and then hire some other people in replacement of moi because that’s what people do.

They said they wanted to put me on hold until Ramadan is over but as far as I’m concerned I am DONE with the grocery store of death and the rude, ugly customers that come with it. You know the ones who roll up in their fancy Range Rovers and their coach purses but then pay with food stamps. YEAHHHH.

I wasted my time there but at least I’m being paid for what I worked these past 2 weeks. I’m kinda sad that it happened because I was happy having a job and earning money, but I knew I would eventually be screwed over in time. Sometimes I think I just wasn’t meant to have a job. Maybe God doesn’t want me to work, maybe he likes me just sitting around, watching TV, hanging out with my friends and eating chicken. Sounds like a great life to me.

I’m trying to apply at Best Buy, which would be WAYYY better to work at seeing I’m a nerd and that’s pretty much the land of nerds….so I would be much happier working at a professional setting rather than some old hairy arabic guy who drops his kids off to sit at the store and doesn’t know how to organize anything.

Ugly Dumpster Girls

August 20 9 comments | tags: MSN Chats · FAVICON Contest

The chat between my brother Hassan and I, late, late at night.

Hass™: she tells her im nasty
Jess: lol what shes probably joking
Hass™: no she was serious.
Hass™: lmfao.
Jess: ill talk to her
Jess: dont worry
Hass™: lmfao she talks crap online
Jess: I WILL TALK TO HER
Jess: stop talking smack urself
Jess: at least she is cute the girls u talk to are ugly dumpsters
Jess: :D
Hass™: LLMFAOOOOO
Jess: lmaoo
Jess: i laughed
Hass™: dana i talk to way better girls
Hass™: omg.
Jess: HEHEHEHE
Jess: uh no trust me
Jess: they are dumpster trashcans
Jess: like they arent even the waste management trash cans they are the trash bins from detroit
Hass™: LMFAO
Jess: they dont even have wheels
Jess: theyre the bins that u gotta drag
Hass™: LMFAOOOO
Hass™: WALALHHHH ILYY DANA UR SO CUTE

And this is why I don’t sleep. Hehehehe.